I was chatting with a group of friends and we were talking about that uneasy feeling, that sense of lost direction. It comes strongest when we spend too much time watching others and seeing how together they have it and how fast they are moving forward towards their goals.
“I need help, what email client do you use?” or
“I feel like you are doing better than me, where do you host your website?”
Well you know what – I realised something today.
We don’t have anyone telling us what the rules are or where the boundaries lie anymore,
and that is making us a little UNCOMFORTABLE.
At the ProBlogger Event a few weeks ago I was lucky enough to chat with Chris Guillebeau. We were joking about when you listen to a great presentation on, let’s say Product Launches;
The speaker gives you incredible information, fills you with inspiration and gets you excited for your next launch.
Then it’s Q&A time and despite the room being full of intelligent, entrepreneurial types, who are more than capable of using google, you can almost guarantee that the first or second question will be;
“What you have said is really great, but I need to know what affiliate program you use.”
Because we are desperately grasping for how to’s, for the next steps and some freakin rules already!
Sorry to tell you but You are in the driver’s seat now and it is time to pull up your big girl pants and get used to it.
As tiny children we humans need boundaries, every teacher and mother alike will tell you kids respond well to rules, even better to the ones that are consistent – so understand this stuff has been ingrained in us for a long time!
We certainly learn to conform and obey at school (or if you are like me, you don’t conform and it makes school a long and painful road), university is more about sitting still and following the rules.
Adulthood gets even worse – get a job, keep a job, wear the right clothes, toe the line and fit in with the crowd.
We learn the social rules and the office rules and the public transport rules and the unspoken rules of family engagement. It sounds exhausting when I write it out but it is just all so natural we don’t think about it.
Then we go out on your own!
Now we have no one to tell us what to charge, what to create, when to get out of bed, how long to spend on twitter, ANYTHING!
It is no wonder we crave instructions and direction.
LET IT GO!
Be brave, breathe it in!
You changed the game – YEP You did that!
Now you have to get yourself comfortable with making up the rules as you go along.
Did you hear I am moving my online home? I am making house with a new business partner and setting up a workroom where I can better serve you and your business – join the mailing list now so you are the first to know about the launch of Studio Exsto. It will be pretty different from what you see here – in a good way!